B-mode from Space

Eiichiro's personal ranking of (greater-)Munich helles

1. Andechs [Yeah!]
2. Tegernsee [Woo hoo!]
3. Augustiner [Best of the six major breweries in Munich]

[a big gap here]

4. Spaten [Good compromise if you do not have access to the above three]
5. Hofbräu; Hacker-Pschorr; Paulaner [I do not have them unless I am in a biergarten]
6. Ayinger [No particular opinion]

[a huge gap here]

100. Löwenbräu [just avoid it]

The Best Helles in Town: Andechser Am Dom [Frauenplatz 7; 100m from U6/U3 "Marienplatz"; 089-24292920]

• Absolutely the best helles around the Munich area is "Andechs," which has been brewed by the Andechs monastery brewery since 1455. The actual location of the brewary is the west of Munich (a couple of hours by a train and a bus), but you can have a tasty Andechser helles in "Andechser Am Dom," near the U-bahn station Marienplatz.
• What is "helles"? While it is usually referred to as a "lager beer," helles has more malt flavor than typical lager beers found in Czech, UK, USA, or Japan. (Typically lager beers you know are usually Pilsners.) You can really experience this with the Andechser Helles: when I had it first, I thought that I was drinking a malt juice! 
• Suggested typical bavaria dishes: "Der Andechser Klassiker" (two veal meat balls); "Schweinsbraten" (sliced grilled pork); "Kaiser Wiener Schnitzel" (deep fried, breaded veal). If you like beef, “Wagyu Burger” and “Rinderfilet” (Beef filet steak) are quite good. See this page for their English menu.
• See this page (or below) for directions from the U-bahn station "Marienplatz," after exiting the U-bahn station toward "Weinstraße." If you come from north, go left after you get off the train, take an escalator, turn left, and take another escalator. You will be on Weinstraße. Go through a path between H&M and TRETTER (Albertgasse) to the big church (Frauenkirche). Go around the church to the left and you will find “Andechser am Dom” next to another German restaurant “Augustiner am Dom” (which sells the third best beer, Augustiner. See the above ranking).

The Best Weißbier in Town: Weisses Bräuhaus [Tal 7; 150m from U6/U3 "Marienplatz"; 089-2901380]

• This place offers Weißbier from "Schneider Weisses," my best favorite Weißbier in Munich. They come with a variety of choices. If you have never had a weißbier before, start with "Blonde." This is your typical Weißbier. If you  had a typical Weißbier before, then have "Original," which is my favorite. It has a darker color and is tastier than typical blonde Weißbier. Finally, after having one or two of those, march onto "Aventinus." This one has a higher alcohol percentage, so be careful not to drink it too much!
• "I heard about Weizen…" Be careful! A word "Weizen," which also describes a wheat beer, is not used in Bavaria. In Bavaria, we call it "Weißbier." You can be officially kicked out of the restaurant if you say "Weizen."
• Another big plus for this place is that they serve the second-to-the-best helles in greater Munich, Tegernsee, on tap. It is worth going there for the helles also.
• I do not have particular suggestions for dishes at Weisses Bräuhaus, but you can download their English menu from this page. One suggestion is to have "Kaiserschmarrn" (lots of pieces of pancakes with Apple sauce) for a desert to share. (It's big!)
• See this page (or below) for directions from the U-bahn station "Marienplatz," after exiting the U-bahn station toward "Tal" or "Rindermarkt." If you come from north, go right after you get off the train, take an escalator, and follow signs saying "Tal" or "Rindermarkt". Both are fine. Go east on Tal, and you will find "Weisses Bräuhaus" on your left.